Yes I am a survivor. When you can walk away from any form of domestic violence, then you are a survivor. It proves that you are strong even when you are being told constantly that you are weak. It proves that you know what is normal behaviour even though you are lead to believe the words & pain are normal & it proves that you honour yourself too much to let it continue.

You see when it starts you think to yourself  'OK that will not happen again', you're even told 'I'm sorry I didn't mean it, it will never happen again'. But then it does happen again & suddenly you don't know what to do or who to go to for help/advice. You have gone from someone who will share everything to keeping this big secret that slowly eats away at you. You find yourself not trusting others & that you have to protect your other half, as this is not the real them.

This is what happened to me. The first time wasn't a tiny slap, it was a full on fight over an ema…

I'm back

I've noticed recently that my passion has begun to be awakened again. My love of the written word has been slowly creeping back into mind.

I have fallen behind so much with my writing & my blog. I wanted to share my story of surviving domestic violence, but I guess at the time it was all still to raw for me. I had so much to say but my confidence had sunk so much, I just couldn't get those words out.

But now I can. I've worked on myself, I've become the strong, confident woman I used to be many moons ago. It's taken time but that time has given me such amazing experiences.

So my story will be shared. My written words will come alive again & I shall use these pages to talk to everyone again.

1st Christmas as a mummy

So this is the first Christmas I have had as a mother. My little boy turned 4 months old over Christmas & its been a blessing watching him learn & grow. I love waking up to his smile each morning, knowing that that grin will wash away any worries that may plague me. The cooing noises he has been making let's me know he is trying to communicate with me, while making himself laugh at any noise he makes. He was thoroughly spoiled over Christmas & watching him trying to open presents was fantastic. He loves the noisy toys but also enjoys sitting with me & reading a good book. We even made our own cards this year with his footprints, creating images of reindeer. Trying to get his print on the card was one of the hardest things my partner & I have had to face, it was fun though as paint went everywhere & we ended up with alien looking prints instead of the cute ones we had seen on the internet.Life as a mother has changed me. I thought it would be something I was…

New Life, New Start

I didn't realise it had been 3 years since I last wrote on here. This used to be my saviour, the place I would let my thoughts flow. Yet over the years I lost my buzz, I lost how to form the written word. I knew who was reading this & began to fear what I could & couldn't write. Which is silly as this was my page & surely as a writer I had every right to write what & how I felt.

No the coward in me became to strong & I gave up. I gave up my passion, my hobby. I bowed down to those who scared me most.

Well not today, if they are still reading this then you will get to hear a lot from me & I will go into detail about how I suffered & what I went through. There is no more hiding for me.

So to update everyone that may still read this & to the new readers out there:

I'm no longer married. That's the first big milestone. I went through a divorce before I hit the big 3 0. I had been married for 3 years, together for 4 years. Why did I finally pl…

Butt kicking time


OK I shall allow all my readers & followers to kick my butt. I've been away for far too long & have not even had the chance to reply to the lovely comments that my readers have left.

Last month I started a new job in a local charity shop (I'm now the new assistant manager) & to be honest this is the first time I have felt human enough to sit at my poorly missed netbook & write. (big awww). It's been great starting the job & I'm loving every minute of it but my poor brain & energy had sizzled. I don't think I have ever slept so much on my days off lol! It's physical, fun & i get to meet lovely but interesting characters.

But by starting the job I have neglected my writing & those who read this blog. So this was my way of saying sorry & to let people know I haven't disappeared lol.

I have also, in between working, managed to finish my degree...woohoo!! I should get my final result for the honours classification in Au…

Wheels on the scooter.


Whoever came up with this ‘toy’ idea needs their head re-examining. Yes it may be a great way to get kids out in the fresh air but they do also have legs…let them walk.
I’m on a bit of a rant for this one as they scooters drive me nuts. There is still a craze for these things & every kid appears to have one. What’s the attraction? I have no idea what makes a child what one of those.
I see mothers walking to or from school carrying these either on buggies or in their hands just for their kid to ride home on or to school on. Then when you’re walking down the street YOU have to move for the kids on these because they have no breaks & if YOU don’t move 1. The kid may fall of the scooter or 2. You get hit by it.
I’ve had one go into the back of my ankles & yeah it hurt & yes I wanted to curse but you can’t because there are kids around. We also have kids riding these past our flat. Now when someone is riding one all you can hear is the thump of the wheels going over pavi…

GBE 2 Guilty Pleasures

I’ll let you into a little secret. My guilty pleasure is magazines. I love nothing better than sitting down with a cuppa & a good magazine.
I buy my dose of magazines each week & also a few monthly ones. I love the glossy pages, the chat pages & the real life stories, I glance over the fashion pages wishing I had hundreds to splash on a new bag or shoes but magazine window shopping is so much cheaper! I enjoy the adverts trying to sell me everything except a new kitchen sink & then I turn to the star signs & the world could fall apart! I also buy the fiction magazines & have a good read of the short stories wishing that I had kicked my bad ass to sit & write the short story that I’ve had notes on for ages.
I always stick to the same magazines. Grazia is my favourite weekly; Glamour & Cosmo are my favourite monthlies. I subscribe to Glamour & still get excited when it drops through the letter box each month!
This month though I was a bit peeved as on…